Guest DeoJusto Posted February 12, 2013 Share Posted February 12, 2013 “Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the Court of Harv, SIT DOWN, AND SHUT UP, ALL OF YOU! On today’s program we have international terrorist and socialite Talia As Ghul, JUST DIE ALREADY YOU ANCIENT HAG, and her man, my good friend, Gotham’s playboy billionaire Bruce Wayne, ROT IN HELL, RICH BOY! He says he loves her and wants to take care of their child, but she thinks he’s been up to no good late at night, YOU’RE ALL GUILTY AS SIN, HANG ‘EM BOTH.†The audience claps and hollers as Harvey Dent jauntily strolls up the stage. He’s wearing a gaudy two color suit, and the half of his head that still has hair has combed it into a tv friendly coif. The stage has a ten foot scarred penny in the backdrop next to a judge’s bench. The stage itself is cut in half, one side with plush furniture and soap opera lighting, the other lit up red with a simple stool. Talia and Bruce sit opposite each other, Talia in the nice side, Bruce on the other. Harvey approaches Talia and nearly stabs her with the microphone. “So Talia tell the court of Harv your side of the story.†“Look,†she says, “I was ready to give him everything, my father even wanted to give him a job, but oh no, he’s too high and mighty to give up his wild playboy lifestyle. You don’t fool my detective, you ain’t so slick. I know what you’re up to at night, I just don’t know who you’re up to.†The audience begins to hoot and a few guys in back let out wolf whistles. Then the chant begins. “HARVEY, HARVEY, HARVEY!†Harvey let’s this go on for a few seconds, then begins to try and rein the crowd in. “Order in the court.†The audience keeps going. "HARVEY, HARVEY, HARVEY" “Order in the court!†They’re just getting louder. He reaches for his revolver, “I SAID ORDER IN THE FREAKIN’ COURT!†He shoots a lighting fixture and the blast shuts them up. Harvey then slides to Bruce’s side and hands him the mic. “So Bruce, what is your defense?†“Hey Harv, first I gotta say, I love the show. As long as you aren’t out robbin’ banks, right? But anyway, Talia doesn’t know what she’s talking about. I don’t know where she got this in her head. I love her, and I love my son, but how can we have a relationship if she doesn’t trust me enough to not try and send assassins after me every time she thinks I’m up to something.†“Are you saying that there aren’t any other women?†“Well… I’m saying that trust is…a very important…and…togetherness...No? †Harvey smiles. “Well then Brucey boy, I got a little surprise for you… BRING FORTH THE PROSECUTION WITNESS†Everybody turns to the left side of the stage as Selena Kyle struts in wearing the kind of leather outfit that might get Harvey another note from the standards department. The audience stands to give her a classic Court of Harv welcome. “BOOOOOOOOOO!†She soaks it up, looks them all in the eye and gives the camera a gesture that will make standards send an addendum to the first note. Before Harvey can give her the mic she takes it from his hands. “Whatever, whatever, you’re all just jealous. What Bruce and me have is purrrfect Harvey, because I can give him what he needs." She cracks her whip and every male jaw in the audience drops. "and I am not giving up on him just because some omnicidal tramp says she’s his baby-momma. I mean just look at her, how do we even know it’s his son? I want a DNA test, cause it look’s like Bane’s kid to me.†This causes Talia to jump from her seat with a sword in hand and charge at Selena. The cameras zoom in way too close. Talia swings the blade for Selena’s head, but the leather-clad cat burglar springs back with ease. The audience is screaming, and then a smoke bomb goes off on stage. Next thing you know, Bruce is gone and security is rushing to the stage. Harvey flips a coin as they begin to separate the two. It comes up tails, so he executes his own security guards on live television. From this point on, no one tries to break it up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Callisto Posted February 12, 2013 Share Posted February 12, 2013 Learn More AboutTalia Al GhulRead more about Talia Al Ghul at WikipediaOfficial Site: DC Comics Links: Talia Al Ghul Wikipedia page Gotham Girls: Talia al Ghul Comicvine Talia page CatwomanRead more about Catwoman at WikipediaOfficial Site: DC Comics Links: Wikipedia Entry Catwoman Webring Gotham Girls Website Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deojusto Posted February 12, 2013 Share Posted February 12, 2013 My submission for the February tourny. I know, Springer references are dated, but I'm a little rusty. Current comic versions of both, weapons for both are on, no guns, arena is the entire studio (the stage, the catwalk above the stage, etc, as long as they don't leave the building). Enjoy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C.T. Posted February 12, 2013 Share Posted February 12, 2013 This is goddamn hilarious. A from me. I think Talia can take this, especially since she's armed and Catwoman doesn't seem to be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xenerack5 Posted February 12, 2013 Share Posted February 12, 2013 DC should totally make this a thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deojusto Posted February 12, 2013 Share Posted February 12, 2013 Oh, Catwoman's got the whip and caltrops and her other stuff. I'll clarify that above. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bigballerju Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 Excellent setup and fun to read. Catwoman is as dead though. They fought in the comics and Talia kicked her ass. Talia only spared her life because she knew at the time how upset Batman would be. Currently Talia would't do the same thing twice and spare her life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Dinsdale Piranha Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 Nice! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Supes Rulez Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 Talia probably knows Bruce will not tolerate her killing Selina, so she'll probably spare her life.That being said, she wins.Who can forget the best example of a Jerry Springer parody...Austin powers 2-Dr.Evil and scott on Jerry Springer show - YouTube Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ZeroAccess Posted February 15, 2013 Share Posted February 15, 2013 Talia Al Ghul: Olympic-level athlete, trained in multiple martial arts (hand to hand), highly intelligent.Catwoman: Acrobatic to beyond super human levels, hand to hand combat, Dragon Style Kung Fu, Karate, stealth, thievery, master of disguise, feline empathy. So both are highly trained athletes in hand to hand combat and mastered multiple disciplines of martial arts. Catwoman has her claws and whip while Talia has a sword. Even though some have stated Talia and Catwoman have fought and Talia was the victor I can’t find any evidence of that. So I’m striking that from my scenario. I understand Talia has the League of Assassins but this is personal, she wants Catwoman to herself with no interference. With Batman *cough* I mean Bruce out of the picture the fight should go uninterrupted. Catwoman would immediately jump into the rafters and shadows and start taking some of the lights out as she is more suited to darkness and her outfit would allow her some stealth. If Talia were to follow she’d be at a huge disadvantage and she knows this so she stays on the ground to fortify herself. Throwing the stool into the rafters she brings the main rafter holding the stage lights down. Catwoman easily twist, tumbles, and maneuvers her body to land lightly on her feet. The stage now is lit sporadically and multiple wires are hanging from the rafters. Talia charges Catwoman causing her to retract her claws in her fingertips boots striking out at Talia. Talia easily dodges those attacks and presses on. Striking Catwoman in the lower arm with a glancing blow, Catwoman immediately uses her whip to laugh across the stage gaining some much needed distance between the two. She strikes her whip out lashing at Talia’s wrist knocking the sword out; Talia reaches down into her boots and produces two short knives. Bringing her vision back to the stage Catwoman is gone again into the shadows. Talia feels a drop of blood softly hit the top of her shoe and strikes upward with lightning speed but Catwoman was the quicker and slashes Talia across the face. Talia blinded strikes forward and get Catwoman in the side where she twist her knife to cause maximum damage. Catwoman crashes to the floor hard but realizing she’s in mortal danger slides her legs out and gashes Talia across the midsection. Both women bleeding profusely square themselves. They know that they need immediate attention or else they’ll bleed out. Catwoman’s vision blurs from lack of blood and the pain in her side. She pulls the blade out and blood gushes out. Talia’s face is shredded and she has lost an eye. The gash to her stomach is deep. Catwoman rushes ahead stumbling as she reaches Talia the blood loss from her side was just too much.Talia smiles as she falls foward grasping her stomach. Even though Catwoman has stealth and near super human acrobatics her weapons cause devastating damage but they’re just not long enough to strike a quick kill. Sources:http://en.wikipedia....i/Talia_al_Ghulhttp://dc.wikia.com/...n_(Selina_Kyle) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AVP vs The Terminator Posted February 15, 2013 Share Posted February 15, 2013 Excellent setup and fun to read. Catwoman is as dead though. They fought in the comics and Talia kicked her ass. Talia only spared her life because she knew at the time how upset Batman would be. Currently Talia would't do the same thing twice and spare her life. If you're talking about the incident during Hush, Batman had Catwoman "guarding" Talia (i.e tying her to a chair and making sure she stayed put), then Lady Shiva burst in and beat the shit out of Catwoman. Talia then KO'd Shiva from behind and gave Catwoman the whole "I could kill you if I wanted to" speech. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest khoi Posted February 15, 2013 Share Posted February 15, 2013 Nice Set-Up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deojusto Posted February 15, 2013 Share Posted February 15, 2013 Talia Al Ghul: Olympic-level athlete, trained in multiple martial arts (hand to hand), highly intelligent.Catwoman: Acrobatic to beyond super human levels, hand to hand combat, Dragon Style Kung Fu, Karate, stealth, thievery, master of disguise, feline empathy. So both are highly trained athletes in hand to hand combat and mastered multiple disciplines of martial arts. Catwoman has her claws and whip while Talia has a sword. Even though some have stated Talia and Catwoman have fought and Talia was the victor I can’t find any evidence of that. So I’m striking that from my scenario. I understand Talia has the League of Assassins but this is personal, she wants Catwoman to herself with no interference. With Batman *cough* I mean Bruce out of the picture the fight should go uninterrupted. Catwoman would immediately jump into the rafters and shadows and start taking some of the lights out as she is more suited to darkness and her outfit would allow her some stealth. If Talia were to follow she’d be at a huge disadvantage and she knows this so she stays on the ground to fortify herself. Throwing the stool into the rafters she brings the main rafter holding the stage lights down. Catwoman easily twist, tumbles, and maneuvers her body to land lightly on her feet. The stage now is lit sporadically and multiple wires are hanging from the rafters. Talia charges Catwoman causing her to retract her claws in her fingertips boots striking out at Talia. Talia easily dodges those attacks and presses on. Striking Catwoman in the lower arm with a glancing blow, Catwoman immediately uses her whip to laugh across the stage gaining some much needed distance between the two. She strikes her whip out lashing at Talia’s wrist knocking the sword out; Talia reaches down into her boots and produces two short knives. Bringing her vision back to the stage Catwoman is gone again into the shadows. Talia feels a drop of blood softly hit the top of her shoe and strikes upward with lightning speed but Catwoman was the quicker and slashes Talia across the face. Talia blinded strikes forward and get Catwoman in the side where she twist her knife to cause maximum damage. Catwoman crashes to the floor hard but realizing she’s in mortal danger slides her legs out and gashes Talia across the midsection. Both women bleeding profusely square themselves. They know that they need immediate attention or else they’ll bleed out. Catwoman’s vision blurs from lack of blood and the pain in her side. She pulls the blade out and blood gushes out. Talia’s face is shredded and she has lost an eye. The gash to her stomach is deep. Catwoman rushes ahead stumbling as she reaches Talia the blood loss from her side was just too much.Talia smiles as she falls foward grasping her stomach. Even though Catwoman has stealth and near super human acrobatics her weapons cause devastating damage but they’re just not long enough to strike a quick kill. Sources:http://en.wikipedia....i/Talia_al_Ghulhttp://dc.wikia.com/...n_(Selina_Kyle) Pretty in depth scenario. Though I'd bet that Talia wouldn't be above going into the rafters and catwalk after Selena. If that happened the acrobatics would pay off with big dividends. Catwoman may not be as lethally minded though, and that would be a definite disadvantage. As for the scene from Hush that people are talking about, I need to read that book. Not just for this scene, but in general I aught to have read it by now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DSkillz Posted February 16, 2013 Share Posted February 16, 2013 Heh, nice entry, Deo. Harvey taking the place of Jerry Springer might actually make his show more entertaining. As for the match, I think Talia wins this catfight. She's always seemed a bit more skilled and deadly to me. It probably won't come to the death, though. Sources:http://en.wikipedia....i/Talia_al_Ghulhttp://dc.wikia.com/...n_(Selina_Kyle) Hey, ZeroAccess. You don't really have to post links to the combatants in every comment you make. That's why Callisto posts the given links for every combatants' profile simultaneously with the match itself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
corvette1710 Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 Talia. I liked the setup as well, it was humorous and the Dark Knight Rises reference(s?) was(were) awesome (I'm assuming the line "That looks more like Bane's kid" was a reference to TDKR). A from me, albeit the fact that you had a couple (literal couple, I only saw two) grammar/spelling mistakes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deojusto Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 Talia. I liked the setup as well, it was humorous and the Dark Knight Rises reference(s?) was(were) awesome (I'm assuming the line "That looks more like Bane's kid" was a reference to TDKR). A from me, albeit the fact that you had a couple (literal couple, I only saw two) grammar/spelling mistakes. It wasn't inherently a TDKR reference since there's still the references to Damian. I think Talia knows Bane in the comics too, he almost became Ra's successor once, so the implication that its his kid might be off-base but would still be a possible inference. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
corvette1710 Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 I think Talia knows Bane in the comics too, he almost became Ra's successor once.I see. *Nods* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patrickthekid Posted February 17, 2013 Share Posted February 17, 2013 Oh, that was hilarious. Too bad Selene's as good as dead here, but it would be a Maury episode actually worth its value. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Callisto Posted February 18, 2013 Share Posted February 18, 2013 Match Final ResultsUSER RATINGS D A Goddamn hilarious. A Heh, nice Springer-styled match! A A My comment stated a large majority of my thoughts on the setup. -Corvette A A SCORE Talia Al Ghul: 13Catwoman: 7FPA: 3.6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Lord Dragon Reborn Posted February 18, 2013 Share Posted February 18, 2013 Who the hell gave this match a D? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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